Prosaic as i am,Tatty as i dealt,Indignation as i felt, and this is how i yelled...

~ Heavy Heart and Wayward Thoughts ~

i know, its time to Zzz. However, dunno why, i'm still sittin here in front of my sis's notebook, and typin this post.

i've been pondering this problem these few days. . i dunno what is wrong with me. . i noe i'm not havin second thoughts. but i realised, that i'm lousy in letting go.
i noe i've already made a decision, there's no turning back. basically,i'm not trying to turn back time, i just felt that i cant let go.
he haunts me everywhere and everything. we really went through so much. although we had bad times, but there were good times as well. Although, i can never forget what he did to me, those punishments. . but he still lingers around. i thought i can do it.
but i cant forget him . . but i do now clearly i've made my choice. never knew lovin a person could be like these till i met wm. i noe E loves me too(before break up), its just that everyone shows their affection in different ways.

i now i'm in a bliss now. . i shldnt be thinkin waywardly. i dunno why i cant help. . 6 yrs. . its so hard to forget. he's an unforgettable passenger in my life journey.
i cant say i'll forget him, but i noe i've moved on to a new chapter of my life. i cant turn back time, all i can do is to be positive and treasure for wat i have now. i'm grateful to found sum1 like wm. i'm thankful for mettin E too.co i've gained alot & also,for sure there were scars remained. Scars etched within me and keeps reminding me not to make the same mistakes again.

i felt so bad. For hurting E. but i have to be heartless. i had been draggin the relationship for over 6 yrs. i have to end it sumhow. but what i've done is way too fast. but i was really touched by wm. i now i shldnt have started another relationship so fast. actually i've been askin myself and wm this question. till now, i have no ans to it but just that when fate comes, its inevitable. Also when fate ends, it'll be gonw like the wind. Fate:lightning; for it comes and go in a swift.

i sincerly thank E for all the memories. i apologized for all that i've done.
thank him for all that we've been through. i hope from now onwards, he'll get the girl of his dream, sum1 he really deserves. i've tried my best, sry for letting go, cos, i've really tried my best. i gave my 6 yrs to u. tke gd cre frm now onwards, and hope ur upcomin gf-wife to be will be the gentle, pretty & loving girl that he owaes wanted.

eve - E: " sry,i've burst our dream. but i noe, 1 day u'll find a even more beautiful dream with this girl of urs, cos that's what u've earned and deserved.all the best. u'll owaes be zui shou xi de mo shen ren"

eve - dear dear: " i'm glad that i've got u wm, cos, i noe that u love me for me. u've never "hiam" me before since the day i met u. u've always been encouragin and supportive. u were always there for me when i'm on my ups and downs. u take such gd care of me and even me myself cant believe it. i hope with 2 hearts beating as one, we'll mould our future. i thank u for ever moment. . cos u made me the happiest gal on earth."

i'm tired le.
-eve outy-

posted by Eve @ 7/05/2007 11:55:00 PM